Failed IVF – it is not the end of the road


In life, there is ebb and flow. Just because things look bleak, doesn’t mean life is not going to brighten up again. Think of yourself as an arrow. You are only being pulled back on the bow so you can spring forward that much further when you let go.

The same is dealing with a failed IVF. After everything you have been through it can be very difficult to accept that there will not be a baby at the end of it all. If you have taken steps to freeze high-quality embryos earlier, now is the time to use them. Then you still have a very good chance of conceiving.

Talk to your doctor about whether you should try again and understand the overall chances of conceiving. The doctor might suggest a different treatment option or alternatively discuss other options, which would maximize your chances of conceiving.

Coping with a failed IVF

  • Do not blame yourself
  • Do not blame your partner
  • Keep communicating with your partner
  • Speak with the counsellor at the clinic
  • Ask help to connect with other patients
  • If often helps to understand why the treatment failed, if the reason can be determined
  • Remind yourself that most of the time there are other treatments and options and that it often takes a few cycles to become pregnant

Why your treatment may have not worked?

You should talk to your doctor about why your treatment has been unsuccessful. There are two main reasons why treatment doesn't work,
  • The embryos fail to develop in the womb
  • Your treatment is cancelled before the eggs are collected or before the embryos are transferred to the womb.

Not sure whether to try again or stop? Get help from our counsellor.

It can be difficult to know whether to carry on with treatment. Every woman and couple is different, so whilst some people want to keep trying, others prefer to move on from treatment at an earlier stage.

Ask your doctor for an honest opinion on whether treatment may work for you. If there’s a very small chance of it working, this may be a factor in you deciding to stop. You should also consider emotional burden the treatment puts on you and your partner and if you do decide try again, make sure you’re getting plenty of support.

It's very common for women and couples to feel a deep sense of bereavement when treatment is unsuccessful. No matter how hard you try to not build up your expectations, it's completely natural to hope for the best.

You can speak to our counsellors. They are specialists who have experience of working with people going through fertility treatment.

Please contact our counselor @ xxxxx xxxxx.